New Year, new endeavor: Self Portrait Tuesday

roxy forever, originally uploaded by roxydynamite.

I discovered Little Birds in the last few months and have been marveling at her world full of her childrens drawings, crafts and thrift shopping. Secret sounding associations to groups like Tie One On and Self Portrait Tuesdays intrigued me. Today, the first Tuesday of a new year, I found myself led into Self Portrait Tuesdays or SPT. I spontaneously decided to join their Flickr group and start posting weekly self portraits to my blog.
Self portraiture is one of my secret vices. I am convinced I am highly unphotogenic unless I am manning the camera. I often assert that as a professional photo editor, I know better than most if the camera is unkind to someone. Yet, if I am in control, I am often pleased with the results. I'm looking forward to being challenged by this group to think about my identity in new ways and to use my new Canon d20 that I am still getting acquainted with. The theme for January is Personal History.
I chose this image for a few reasons. The first being it is the oldest self portrait I have up on Flickr and at the same time the most recent I posted from some recently digitized negatives. A bit of kismit there perhaps. I titled the image "Roxy Forever" when I took it. Taking part in history, making a mark however small, is something I think about often. I like thinking that a part of me will go on forever. It's more of a finger on my mortality over narcissism, I think. This photo is a moment in my past where I was trying to become history in a personal way. I wonder if this new endeavor will continue that pursuit.

I'm not good at making or rather keeping New Year's resolutions. But the list maker in me cannot resist. One thing I thought of was trying to work on my body image in 2006. When I photograph myself, it is always the head and shoulders. My first reaction to photos other people take of me is to think I look chubby. I want to be able to say "So what! That's me and boy am I cute." My weight has gone up and down. My body seems to like to hover right around where I'm at now. Now, if I can only convince my head to like it as well.

Other things I hope the new year holds for me:
time to create crafty things
as much time with my Grams as possible
more regular blog posts
take myself less seriously
make some good photos
learn how to discipline Quentin Badass
bake more
lots of kisses under a fort made of blankets

Comments

[Emily]

I like the glimmer of your self surrounded by color, rebel art and some darkness. We are all blurred and hard to see. That's what makes self discovery such an interesting journey. Love the self portrait...

[Katharine]

Thanks for your comment on my blog. I'm impressed by your first SPT. I need to learn to be less literal about things, perhaps this will help me be more imaginative.
Good luck with your future self-portraits. x